Gadgets are lame

but my iPhone is rad.

First of all - yknow how people get really disoriented in an avalanche and they don't know which way is up? I learned from a nazi zombie movie (Dead Snow) that you're supposed to drool, and you'll be able to tell which way is up by the direction it runs down your face. That's me, trying to figure out where I am, on a daily basis. But with my little trinket, I will never be lost again.

Except for when I fall and break my face. Although I swear it was really dark and there was a huge pothole.